When you google “how to be an adult” most of the results that come back talk about preparing for job interviews, managing your finances, cleaning up after yourself, and not being a disrespectful asshole.
Visit a medical professional. If you come from a tall family and you’re not growing by your mid-teens, or if your height has not changed much from before puberty to during puberty, then it’s a good idea to see a doctor. Conditions that can stunt your growth (such as human growth hormone deficiency or autoimmune diseases) are fairly rare, but they do exist. If you are eating a healthy diet and getting plenty of rest, but you are still not growing, then it is time to consult a doctor.
Likewise, a personality that has developed with a goal of serving the dominant function above all other considerations often results in a person who is imbalanced. In severe cases, the weaknesses associated with the given type are often quite apparent to others, and overshadow the individual’s natural strengths. Such a drastic imbalance is not common, and may be the result of continuous and extreme stress. Most people will experience times in their lives during which they are stressed to the point of serious imbalance. People who experience this constantly have issues that need to be dealt with, and should seek help.
Before you can move on and learn from these flawed value systems, you must experience the pain of them failing. That means not denying that they are failing. That means not avoiding the pain of that failure. That means facing that failure head on and admitting what is plain to see: that you fucked up, and there’s gotta be a better way.
When asking employees to consider their personal development objectives, make it clear that an objective doesn’t always have to relate to something that they need to improve. It could equally be about further developing an existing strength.
Reach out to the people who hate you. If you ever stand for something, you are going to get haters. It’s easy to hate the people who hate us. It’s much more challenging to love them back. Being able to forgive, let go and show love to these people requires magnanimity and an open heart. Is there anyone who dislikes or hates you in your life? If so, reach out to them. Show them love. Seek a resolution and get closure on past grievances. Even if they refuses to reciprocate, love them all the same. It’s much more liberating than to hate them back.
When you achieve adulthood, you realize that viewing some relationships and pursuits as transactions guts them of all joy and meaning. That living in a world where everything is bargained for enslaves you to other people’s thoughts and desires rather than freeing you to pursue your own. To stand on your own two feet, you must be willing to sometimes stand alone.
Have a weekly exercise routine. A better you starts with being in better physical shape. I personally make it a point to jog at least 3 times a week, at least 30 minutes each time. You may want to mix it up with jogging, gym lessons and swimming for variation.
Modern democracy was basically invented under the assumption that the average human being is a selfish delusional piece of shit. The belief went that the only way to protect us from ourselves is to create systems so interlocking and interdependent that no one person or group can completely hose the rest of the population at any given time.
Learn how to set yourself effective personal goals and find the motivation you need to achieve them. This is the essence of personal development, a set of skills designed to help you reach your full potential, at work, in study and in your personal life.
…then my mom walked in. And all hell broke loose — including but not limited to a much-needed bath. I learned a lesson that day too. Stealing ice cream and then dumping it all over yourself and the kitchen floor makes your mother extremely angry. And angry mothers suck. They are not pleasant to be around. They scold you and punish you. And that day, much like the day with the stove, I learned what not to do.
This, quite literally, is maturity in action: developing higher-level and more abstract principles to enhance decision making in a wider range of contexts. This is how you adjust to the world, how you learn to handle the seemingly infinite permutations of experience. It is a major cognitive leap for children and fundamental to growing up in a healthy, happy way.1
It is important to have a good metabolism. Hence, you can have six balanced meals throughout the day. Smaller but well-spanned portions can be helpful to boost your metabolic rate. This will lead to lesser fat storage in your body, thus allowing you to grow taller.
Jump up ^ Finn, Lisabeth D.; Bishop, Brian; Sparrow, Neville H. (May 2007). “Mutual help groups: an important gateway to wellbeing and mental health”. Australian Health Review. 31 (2): 246–255. doi:10.1071/ah070246. ISSN 1449-8944. PMID 17470046.
One of the most useful techniques I discovered, was a simple, but very effective technique. It consisted of watching how people behaved and acted in various situations, and then looking inside myself, to find out if I behaved in the same way under the same conditions.
Each day, you receive information about what you want from life but if you are not aware, these messages slip by without you even noticing them. A great opportunity for learning and self-improvement is lost. It would surprise some people to learn how many coaching clients I have spoken to who have told me they have no idea what they want from life. They have spent their life missing the feedback and messages, which would lead to their own personal development.
On top of that, these high-level, adult values are the definition of what we consider to be noble and virtuous. It’s the CEO who takes the blame for an employee’s fuck up. It’s the teacher who sacrifices her vacation days to help tutor a struggling student. It’s a friend who risks the friendship by telling you that your partying has gotten out of control.
Start a blog about personal development. To help others grow, you need to first be walking the talk. There are expectations of you, both from yourself and from others, which you have to uphold. I run The Personal Excellence Blog, where I share my personal journey and insights on how to live a better life. Readers look toward my articles to improve themselves, which enforces to me that I need to keep improving, for myself and for the people I’m reaching out to.
Confidence. Studies have revealed that an individual’s IQ is not the most important component for success. Instead, the following three factors are considered to be much more important than intelligence in determining success: self-confidence, goal setting, and perseverance. An individual’s self-esteem, or your self-confidence, is basically what he or she thinks about himself or herself. One of the reasons for boosting your self-confidence is that there is a strong association between confidence and success. Hence, one of your self-development goals should definitely be to boost your self-confidence.
Making the decision to improve on your skills takes you a step closer to feeling more confident. Once you have achieved a certain goal, gained another skill, or developed a certain area of your life, you naturally feel good about yourself. The more you keep on developing in the areas of your life you are not confident in, the more you can boost your confidence.
Relationships are a double-edged sword. They either lift you up or drag you down. When you improve your personal development, you are better able to see which relationships are worth investing in and which need to be cut loose. You also develop the skills to make the most of those relationships which have the most positive impact on your life.
I would argue that self-help tourists are using self-improvement advice in a healthy manner and that self-help junkies are (often, but not always) using it in an unhealthy manner. Remember, the paradoxical point of all self-improvement is to reach a point where you no longer feel you need to improve yourself. Therefore, the constant indulgence in self-improvement material just continues to feed that feeling of inadequacy.
Obviously this has to be balanced with an intellectual approach of improvement, but how can the intellect, the rational, thinking mind, which causes us so much stress and so many problems, also be the answer to those problems. It’s like the blind leading the blind. So it’s only by addressing, approaching or accessing the broader, innate essence of mind – otherwise known as awareness – that we can really start to make sense of it all.
This is a terrific water/nutrient saving system. Nutrients are dripped right next to the root system which is held in aggregate (medium). There is less evaporation and this system is good for stealth or apartment growing.
Don’t multitask or juggle too many things. Research says it can be damaging to our brains. You end up splitting your attention over many tasks, losing focus, lowering the quality of your work, and taking longer to hit your goals.
Hobbies serve a multitude of purposes. You learn a new skill, it’s (usually) a creative or physical outlet, it often introduces you to new people, it gets you out of that comfy place, it’s usually an achievement of something you’ve always wanted to do or try, and it gives you something interesting to talk about when you meet new people. Being passionate about something different is cool. Passionate people are interesting, and it doesn’t even matter what the passion is. It’s energizing to talk to someone who has a real excited love for something.
Jump up ^ Kercheval, Briony L (March 2005). Women’s experiences at GROW: ‘There’s an opportunity there to grow way beyond what you thought you could…’ (PDF) (Master of Applied Psychology (Community) School of Psychology, Faculty of Arts thesis). Victoria, Australia: Victoria University, Footscray. Archived from the original (PDF) on 2010-01-22. Retrieved 2010-01-22.
Whatever the nature of his Dream, a young man has the developmental task of giving it greater definition and finding ways to live it out. It makes a great difference in his growth whether his initial life structure is consonant with and infused by the Dream, or opposed to it. If the Dream remains unconnected to his life it may simply die, and with it his sense of aliveness and purpose.
It’s probably an overstatement to say that Marilyn Manson saved my life. But he might have saved my maturity. When I was 13, I was kicked out of my school and lost almost all of my friends. My parents divorced a few months later, and not long after, my brother moved out of the house. To get me away from the bad influences around me, my parents sent me to a Christian school in suburban Texas5 where I knew no one. I was an atheist and unathletic geek in a state that worships football and Jesus, in that order.
Personal development is an ongoing process of self-improvement either in your career, in your education, in your personal life, or in all of these areas. It is about setting goals for yourself and putting plans in place to reach those goals.
Ready for a change? These well-researched (and heartfelt) talks offer ideas and inspiration for all aspects of your life, from creativity to vulnerability, from competitive sports to collaborative games.