Keep your immune system strong. Some childhood illnesses can stunt your growth. Most of them can be avoided by the routine immunizations you may have had as an infant, but stay on the safe side by ingesting plenty of Vitamin C (found in citrus fruits such as oranges, grapefruits, and lemons) and getting plenty of rest as soon as you notice that you feel sick.
“In a consumerist society, we are not meant to buy one pair of jeans and then be satisfied,” Cederström and Spicer write, and the same, they think, is true of self-improvement. We are being sold on the need to upgrade all parts of ourselves, all at once, including parts that we did not previously know needed upgrading. (This may explain Yoni eggs, stone vaginal inserts that purport to strengthen women’s pelvic-floor muscles and take away “negative energy.” Gwyneth Paltrow’s Web site, Goop, offers them in both jade and rose quartz.) There is a great deal of money to be made by those who diagnose and treat our fears of inadequacy; Cederström and Spicer estimate that the self-improvement industry takes in ten billion dollars a year. (They report that they each spent more than ten thousand dollars, not to mention thousands of hours, on their own quests.) The good life may have sufficed for Plato and Aristotle, but it is no longer enough. “We are under pressure to show that we know how to lead the perfect life,” Cederström and Spicer write.
This is an improvement, but there’s still a weakness in this adolescent approach to life. Everything is seen as a trade-off. Older children and adolescents (and a shocking number of adults) approach life as an endless series of bargains. I will do what my boss says so I can get money. I will call my mother so I don’t get yelled at. I will do my homework so I don’t fuck up my future. I will lie and pretend to be nice so I don’t have to deal with conflict.
In my first post in this exploration of how we can produce meaningful and last life change, I described the four obstacles that prevent change. In my last post on this topic, I introduced you to the five building blocks of change. These steps I just described set the stage for change, but the real work lies ahead. Change can be scary, tiring, frustrating, and repetitious. And change takes time. How much?, you might ask. It depends on your ability to remove the four obstacles to change and embrace the five building blocks I discussed above. It also relies on your ability to commit to the minute-to-minute process of change. But I have found that when someone makes a deep commitment to change, they can expect to see a positive shift in 3-6 months.
Although you have a variety of reasons for self-growth, the most important one is that self-development can change your life for better. Personal development requires a lot of time and effort, but it pays off if you are a determined person who keeps on becoming better day after day.
Overcome your fears. All of us have fears. Fear of uncertainty, fear of public speaking, fear of risk… All our fears keep us in the same position and prevent us from growing. Recognize that your fears reflect areas where you can grow. I always think of fears as the compass for growth. If I have a fear about something, it represents something I’ve yet to address, and addressing it helps me to grow.
Jump up ^ Kennedy, Mellen (1990). Psychiatric Hospitalizations of GROWers. Second Biennial Conference on Community Research and Action, East Lansing, Michigan. cited in Kyrouz, Elaina M.; Humphreys, Keith; Loomis, Colleen (October 2002). “Chapter 4: A Review of Research on the Effectiveness of Self-help Mutual Aid Groups”. In White, Barbara J.; Madara, Edward J. American Self-Help Group Clearinghouse Self-Help Group Sourcebook (7th ed.). American Self-Help Group Clearinghouse. pp. 71–86. ISBN 1-930683-00-6. Retrieved 2008-01-06.
Actions that are premeditated with the desire to get a certain result out of someone or something, are bargaining/transactional values. There’s a difference between telling someone you’re interested in them because that’s what you think they want to hear, and simply telling someone you’re interested in them because you’re freely expressing yourself. The latter is honesty, the former is manipulation. And the line between the two is blurry for a lot of people.8
Learn chess (or any strategy game). I found chess is a terrific game to learn strategy and hone your brainpower. Not only do you have fun, you also get to exercise your analytical skills. You can also learn strategy from other board games or computer games, such as Othello, Chinese Chess, WarCraft, and so on.
The ancients who wished to illustrate illustrious virtue throughout the kingdom first ordered well their own states. Wishing to order well their states, they first regulated their families. Wishing to regulate their families, they first cultivated their persons. Wishing to cultivate their persons, they first rectified their hearts. Wishing to rectify their hearts, they first sought to be sincere in their thoughts. Wishing to be sincere in their thoughts, they first extended to the utmost their knowledge. Such extension of knowledge lay in the investigation of things.
A common criticism surrounding personal development programs is that they are often treated as an arbitrary performance management tool to pay lip service to, but ultimately ignored. As such, many companies have decided to replace personal development programs with SMART Personal Development Objectives, which are regularly reviewed and updated. Personal Development Objectives help employees achieve career goals and improve overall performance.
There will be tough times in life. When these tough times occur, you need to have the skills and attributes to deal effectively with them. Personal development cannot prevent bad things from occurring but it will help you deal with them when they do. You will have greater confidence, resilience, personal and interpersonal skills to cope with any eventuality.
The first day or so might be hard, but give your body time to adjust and you will be amazed how much better your life will be. That drop off of energy in the afternoon you always experience will no longer happen. You won’t wake up tired any longer. You just have to give yourself a few days to adjust.
Hanging relieves the pressure from compressing your spine. Hang upright from a bar or use an inversion table or boots. The bar should be high enough for you to hang freely. Slowly relax your spine. Continue for 20-30 seconds. Repeat three to five times. When hanging by your arms, don’t hyper-extend your shoulders. The ball of the joint should be firmly in the socket.
Back in 2015, Red Bull took their athletes through a series of “fear exercises” to help them perform better under pressure.They had to drive racing cars on a dirt track, hold their breath under wat…(more)
Jump up ^ Some sources recognize personal development as an “industry”: see for example Cullen, John G. (2009). “How to sell your soul and still get into Heaven: Steven Covey’s epiphany-inducing technology of effective selfhood”. Human Relations. SAGE Publications. 62 (8): 1231–1254. doi:10.1177/0018726709334493. ISSN 0018-7267. Retrieved 2010-04-28. The growth of the personal development industry and its gurus continues to be resisted across a number of genres. and Grant, Anthony M.; Blythe O’Hara (November 2006). “The self-presentation of commercial Australian life coaching schools: Cause for concern?” (PDF). International Coaching Psychology Review. Leicester: The British Psychological Society. 1 (2): 21–33 . ISSN 1750-2764. Retrieved 2010-04-28. […] much of the commercial life coaching and personal development industry is grounded more on hyperbole and rhetoric than solid behavioural science (Grant, 2001) […] and Grant, Anthony M.; Michael J. Cavanagh (December 2007). “Evidence-based coaching: Flourishing or languishing?”. Australian Psychologist. Australian Psychological Society. 42 (4): 239–254. doi:10.1080/00050060701648175. ISSN 1742-9544. Retrieved 2010-04-28. To flourish, coaching psychology needs to remain clearly differentiated from the frequently sensationalistic and pseudoscientific facets of the personal development industry while at the same time engaging in the development of the wider coaching industry.
12. Overcome Limiting Beliefs. Limiting beliefs keep us trapped in our comfort zone and prevent us from trying new things and taking risks for fear of getting hurt. We can have limiting beliefs about anything–money, success, relationships, and so on. You can even have limiting beliefs about yourself and what you’re capable of.
Put someone up to a challenge. Competition is one of the best ways to grow. Set a challenge (weight loss, exercise, financial challenge, etc) and compete with an interested friend to see who achieves the target first. Through the process, both of you will gain more than if you were to set off on the target alone.
The breaststroke is especially recommended for those who wish to increase their height. Swimming, as already discussed, is a full body, intense exercise – something that will help to lengthen your muscles and build muscle strength.
A balanced diet is absolutely essential to get proper nutrition. Stay away from junk food at any cost. Avoid saturated fats, carbonated drinks, and excessive sugar-loaded foods, as these can cause a negative impact on your overall growth pattern. Ensure you get all the vitamins and minerals that your body needs in order to have a healthy growth. There are many other foods that can help you maintain a balanced diet.
You might be wondering how these messages are delivered. The answer is that they are delivered in the form of feelings and contrast. Each day you encounter things which you feel bad about. You don’t like something or, you don’t like a situation the way it currently is. Imagine if you took the opportunity to ask yourself questions such as:
When parents and teachers fail to do this, it’s usually because they themselves are stuck at an adolescent level of value judgments. They, too, see the world in transactional terms. They, too, bargain love for sex, loyalty for affection, respect for obedience. In fact, they likely bargain with their kids for affection, love, or respect. They think it’s normal, so the kid grows up thinking it’s normal. And the shitty, shallow, transactional parent/child relationship is then replicated when the kid begins forming romantic relationships.4
Pleasure/pain values fail for the simple reason that pleasure and pain are bad long-term predictors of health, growth, and happiness. OK, yeah, touching a hot stove sucks and you shouldn’t do that anymore. But what about lying to a friend? Or waking up early for work? Or, like, not doing heroin. Those are just a few of the millions of examples where pursuing pleasure/pain values will lead you astray.9
I would argue that self-help tourists are using self-improvement advice in a healthy manner and that self-help junkies are (often, but not always) using it in an unhealthy manner. Remember, the paradoxical point of all self-improvement is to reach a point where you no longer feel you need to improve yourself. Therefore, the constant indulgence in self-improvement material just continues to feed that feeling of inadequacy.